How to Draw a Emo Boy

If you're intimidated by an emo boy and want to start talking to him, try to remember that he really isn't that different from anyone else. Be friendly and authentic, ask him about his favorite bands, and find common interests to connect over. Even if you aren't emo yourself, you can still talk to him and become friends.

1. 1

   Say "hi" and be friendly whenever you run into him. He may be used to people ignoring him or teasing him because of his emo style, so whenever you get the chance, be kind to him. Smile, say hello, and make eye contact.^[1]

   • Even if he doesn't respond to you for the first few days, eventually he will. He may appear closed off or kind of gruff, but don't let that put you off. After all, everyone appreciates kindness in their lives.

   Tip: Try not to be overly enthusiastic when you see him. A simple "hi" and smile can go a long way. If you act over-the-top and are super bubbly and energetic, he may get a little uncomfortable.

2. 2

   Start a conversation with an observation or compliment. If you've never talked to this guy before, you may feel nervous about breaking the ice. Try your best to keep cool and use something simple, like a comment about a class or a compliment about his appearance, to start talking. Try thinking of a few conversation starters beforehand so that you feel more prepared. For example, you could say any of the following:^[2]

   • "Hey, I'm Lauren; we're in the same Math class. I thought today's pop quiz was kind of hard! How do you think you did?"
   • "I love your band T-shirt. Did you get it at a show?"
   • "I noticed you were reading the first Harry Potter book. I love them! Who is your favorite character so far?"

3. 3

   Ask him open-ended questions to get him to talk more. An open-ended question is one that requires more than a "yes" or "no" answer. The next time you have a few minutes before or after class or see that he is online, try starting a conversation with a question. Here are some easy examples you can use:^[3]

   • What did you think of class today?
   • I saw you went to the concert on Friday. How did you first find out about the band?
   • What did you do over the weekend?
   • What are some of your favorite bands?

4. 4

   Connect with him on social media if you feel shy about talking in person. Start following him on whatever social media platform he uses the most, whether that is Snapchat, Instagram, Tumblr, Twitter, or something else. Try interacting with him once or twice a week at first by liking his posts or leaving comments. After 1-2 weeks, try sending him a direct message about something he shared online. For example:^[4]

   • If he posts about a TV show or movie you like, send him a DM that says something like, "I love that show! I can't wait for the season finale to find out who the killer is. Who do you suspect?"
   • If he posts about a band he likes, send him a message that says something like, "I've heard of this group but haven't listened to any of their music. What do you recommend?"
   • You could even send a simple message that says something like, "Hey! I know we have a few classes together but don't think we've ever actually talked. What do you think of the book we're reading for English right now?"

1. 1

   Find out what bands he likes and listen to their albums. Music is a huge part of emo culture, and there are lots of different subgenres he could be into. Pay attention to the music he talks about, what band T-shirts he wears, concerts he goes to, and anything else that might clue you into what he's listening to.^[5]

   • For example, if you hear him talking about a new band he discovered, say something like, "What album of theirs do you think I should listen to first? I never know where to start when I hear of new groups!"
   • If you're looking to get a good overview of emo music, try listening to My Chemical Romance, Fall Out Boy, Taking Back Sunday, Panic! at the Disco, Dashboard Confessional, Paramore, and Brand New. These are more popular and well-known groups, but they'll give you a good introduction to the scene.

   Tip: Check out these different subgenres to learn more about the variety in emo music: emocore, post-emo indie rock, emo pop, and screamo.

2. 2

   Pay attention to his hobbies and extracurriculars. A lot of emo guys are into more creative hobbies, like writing, drawing, and reading. Maybe he likes to write lyrics or poetry, or perhaps he is into graphic design. He may even love to design his clothes and experiment with different hair and makeup styles. Find out if he belongs to any clubs, or ask him what his hobbies are.

   • Once you know what he is into, you'll know if you have any common interests that you can bond over.
   • You could also ask him to teach you about something he likes to do. For example, if he dyes his hair, you could ask him for tips.
   • If he does belong to a club or a certain extracurricular activity, consider joining that same group. You'll learn something new and have more to talk about with him.

3. 3

   Go to events and social gatherings where he will be. If there is an emo band coming to town, get tickets and ask him if he wants to go or take a friend—either way, you can talk with him about the experience later. Or, if he goes to school events, frequents a particular coffee shop, or volunteers somewhere, make it a point to be there, too.^[6]

   • Definitely avoid stalking him, though. If you go to an event with friends, spend time with them but make it a point to say hi to him if you see him. Don't just follow him around, as that would be uncomfortable.
   • If you're able to, start up a conversation with him while you're there. Ask him what he thinks of the event, what he's doing later, or who he is there with.

4. 4

   Avoid making assumptions about him just because he's emo. While he may dress a certain way, wear a certain hairstyle, and like a specific kind of music, that doesn't mean there isn't more to his personality. Keep an open mind when you talk to him and avoid making judgments or applying stereotypes to his personality.^[7]

   • For example, just because he's emo doesn't mean he couldn't also enjoy playing sports or spending time with his family.
   • Being emo also doesn't automatically mean that he is depressed, sad, or lonely.

1. 1

   Be authentic and don't pretend to like things just to impress him. If you are emo, that's cool, but you can still talk to an emo guy and be friends with him even if you aren't. Be true to yourself—he will be able to tell if you're posing and won't be interested in talking with you if he feels like you're putting on a front.^[8]

   • For example, don't change your hair or clothes just to impress him. If you're genuinely interested in changing your style, that's great, but do it for yourself.
   • Don't pretend to know things about emo culture and music that you don't actually know. It's okay to ask questions and admit you aren't familiar with something.

2. 2

   Ask him for recommendations about music, style, and places to go. One of the best ways to get to know someone better is to ask them for their opinion on something, whether that's the best album to listen to by a new-to-you music artist, or the best place to shop for a new pair of Converse shoes. He'll be flattered that you asked, and it'll give you something to bring up in a later conversation.^[9]

   • For example, you could say something like, "I noticed you go to a lot of concerts. Who is coming to town soon that you think I should absolutely go see?"

3. 3

   Ask him to hang out sometime either in a group or one-on-one. You already know a bit about his likes and dislikes, so use that to your advantage. You could ask him to watch a movie, go to a concert, do homework together, or any other activity you think he might be into.^[10]

   • If you asked him for a recommendation about something earlier, use that information. For example, if he told you about his favorite coffee shop, say something like, "Hey! I was thinking of going to that coffee shop you told me about to do some homework this weekend. Want to meet up?"
   • If a group-hang is more your style, try asking something like, "I saw that band you like is coming to town next month. I think it'd be fun to get a group of people together to get dinner beforehand and then go see the show. You in?"

4. 4

   Try to be sensitive to his moods and be supportive when needed. Pay attention to how he acts. If he seems upset, ask him if he is okay or if there is anything you can do to help. Show him that you see him underneath of his emo exterior.^[11]

   • For example, if he seems extra quiet or moody, try saying, "Is everything okay? I noticed you seemed a little down during class today. Want to talk?"
   • If he doesn't want to talk, offer to do something with him, like watching a movie, going to the mall, or grabbing a bite to eat.

5. 5

   Share your feelings and opinions so he gets to see your personality. Talking to an emo guy is about more than just getting to know him—he needs to get to know you, too, so that he knows he can trust you. Don't be afraid to tell him things about your likes and dislikes or to recommend things to him.^[12]

   • Remember that it's okay to disagree about things or not like all the same stuff. You can have a great conversation with him by talking about the reasons why you do or don't like a particular thing, especially if he has a different opinion.

Add New Question

• Question

  Would an emo guy ever date a punk girl?

  

  Sarah Battilana

  Community Answer

  There is definitely hope that he would! Try finding common interests with him to see if there is something you can connect over, like music or art. Don't write it off just because you're punk and he is emo.

• Question

  I probably shouldn't pursue an emo boy if he is in a relationship, right?

  

  Sarah Battilana

  Community Answer

  If he is dating someone, you shouldn't try to interfere with that relationship. But if his relationship ends, you should feel free to talk to him more in a romantic way.

• Question

  What if he is my dad?

  

  Sarah Battilana

  Community Answer

  This may be a little different than trying to talk to someone your own age who is emo. If you're trying to connect with your dad more, ask him to introduce you to some of his favorite bands and ask him about his own experiences growing up when he was a teen.

• Question

  How do you talk to him if you are emo, too?

  

  Sarah Battilana

  Community Answer

  You're in luck! If you are emo, you already have so much in common. Try talking to him before or after class, ask him if he has heard of certain artists that you like, or ask him for a recommendation about something to start up a conversation.

• Question

  Me and my dad looked at this tutorial in an effort for me to talk to this guy at my school, but he just ignored me and called me a name. What do I do?

  

  Sarah Battilana

  Community Answer

  If he was mean to you, ignored you, and called you a name, maybe he isn't a nice person. If someone treats you badly, you shouldn't give them your time and attention any more. If he changes and apologizes, that's great; but otherwise, you shouldn't keep pursuing him.

• Question

  What if you're really shy?

  

  Sarah Battilana

  Community Answer

  Start by simply saying "hi" to him whenever you see him. Then, over time, try asking him questions, like where he got his shoes/shirts/bag, what kind of music he likes, or other things related to him being emo. Even if you're shy, you can definitely talk to him!

• Question

  What if my emo boyfriend will not talk to me?

  

  Sarah Battilana

  Community Answer

  Try asking him directly what is going on and why he is ignoring you. If he still won't talk to you, try giving him some space for a few days.

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• Remember that just because he is emo doesn't mean that he's different from most other guys. Just talk to him like you would someone else.

• The best way to get close to an emo guy is to be authentic. Even if you're not emo yourself, he'll appreciate your honesty and will be drawn to you.

About this article

Article Summary X

Talking to an emo boy is all about finding things to talk about and getting to know the real him. If you haven't talked before, you might feel nervous, but don't worry! It's easy to introduce yourself. Just use an observation or a compliment to strike up a conversation. For example, you could say, "I love your band T-shirt. Did you get it at a show?" Once you've started talking, find out what bands he likes and give them a listen. This will give the 2 of you something to talk about next time you see him. Or, if he doesn't like music, try talking to him about something else you have in common, whether that's drawing, writing lyrics, or emo hairstyles. Remember that it's important to be true to yourself, so don't change your look or personality just to impress him! It's possible for non-emo people to be friends with emo people, so just focus on being yourself. To learn how to ask an emo boy to hang out, read on! To learn how to ask an emo boy to hang out, read on!

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